By scoundrel ghost
Bullshit!!!!
Seriously. I mean BULL SHIT!
We are nothing more that smart animals.
Sometimes too smart for our own good.
Any animal caught in a trap would gnaw
off their own leg to escape.
To be free.
Any spouse trapped, will claw through
the wall to make a back door!
Hell, sometimes they are
practically being shoved through the wall.
No animal can live in captivity.
It is genetically imprinted in our brains
fight or flight.
Fighting does not work in a marriage.
Flighting does. Cut bait and run!
When the knot is so deeply tangled
and tied so tight,
undoing it is impossible.
Better to cut off the knot
and make two new separate
whole pieces.
Misery needs company. So if hanging around
for the kids or because your religion says so,
then rethink your thinking.
Unless you want dysfunctional kids
and a life wasted.
My god wants me to be kind and also
healthy and happy.
End the end only a healthy free you
can make a difference in the universe.
When you take care of yourself
then only can you be
strong and independent for others.
Unfortunately, some people cannot change.
They gather and huddle. Wallowing.
Colluding in their perceived victimization.
Refusing to acknowledge their
self pity, fear, anger and denial
of their own responsibility for their lives.
My one saving grace is, i have been one
who pushes to improve, to move forward
searching for growth. When I stand still,
I rot and have rotted.
I know continuing to move forward
in the marriage can be an answer
to solving a problem.
But when there is no progress it is only
the same problems without solutions.
It is the illusion of successful trap.
Sometimes a 90 or 180 degree turn is in order.
Sure cowards run,
but they live to see another
beautiful day.
2 comments:
There's no back door in a marriage house just as there is no place for fight or flight. If you're looking for one, then you are with the wrong person so gnaw away. And yes, the sooner the better, kids or not, holy or not.
Marriages last because two people truly love each other and enjoy each others company. That's it. It's a shame nearly all couples aren't there.
If you do not have that, then it is only a matter of time, children or not.
Everything is temporary in a marriage except the bond between the two; the infatuation passes, the sex drives go opposite directions, the lifestyles change, even the children will grow and leave.
In the end, after it all, you have two people that like being together without exception and without expectation.
That's a very hard and difficult thing to find. Impossible. People look for something that cannot be found. Actually, it finds you. It just has to happen on its own; not by the time you're 22 or because your the last single person in your family...
You cannot orchestrate a relationship that last. There's no menu for a lifetime of happiness. All you know is the now and what you like now will change later. That's why people "fall out of love"
Our selfish, self serving nature will soon destroy an inadequate relationship.
I surmise that those that have "picked" their partner based on weight, color, finances, timing, things in the now. . . do not really know love. Any of those criteria change and someone wants out. If their nature is strong, they'll chew through their leg. If not, they'll stay in the box.
once again so excellant and true. we cannot be faulted for our earnest mistakes. however we can for staying in problems without solutions. people change. what you r today will not be tomorrow. our words, thoufhts and perceptions of self and others are skewed by self absorption. only through open mindedness, willingness, honesty and a humble attitude can we begin to know ourself and love others.
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